Monday, August 8, 2011

The Brawl

A few days while searching for a new book on the infamous Khao San road in Bangkok, Thailand, I happened to witness two inebriated men verbally taunt each other and proceed to duke it out MMA style. After the one drunkard turned fighter unleashed a wicked round house kick to the other contender's jaw, both men proceeded to take each other down and spraw on the mat, I mean macadam. Needless to say, it wasn't before long that one courageous onlooker managed to step in and act as a referee and break up the foul play.

Although the one seemed to walk away with just a few cuts, the other did not seem to fare so well. Walking away from the virtual ring and the curious crowd he was standing just a few feet beside me. I noticed his nose and lip were bleeding. Mumbling some slurred words in drunken gibberish to a Thai person, it was obvious that he was not in the right state of mind. Tempted to ask him for help, I wasn't even sure if he was aware of what just happened. Glancing up and down the pitiful fighter's body I was about to turn my eyes away until they caught hold of a freshly inked tattoo on his right rib cage. It read "Live life to the fullest" in an old English script. Although I obviously felt sorry for the man, I couldn't help but chuckle because he was living life to his fullest at least in his mind.

Despite the gnashed scrapes now etched on his blond hair and blue eyed face and the unknown cause of the confrontation, he was traveling in a foreign country and was not afraid to be spontaneous which says a lot considering many are afraid to leave their own house and go to the next county or city. Although I do not have much respect for fighters and those who express anger in negative ways, I do applaud those who take the time to experience another culture and immerse themselves in a different world.

Whether tattoos have become an over commercialized mainstream trend that have lost their age old rite of passage symbology, I have noticed that more and more people are getting inked to remind them of what they should do or remember whether it is for the good or for the bad. There was an obvious reason why he had chosen those specific words to be on his skin for the rest of his life. Now, If only he had another one that read "Mind Your P's and Q's."

Friday, August 5, 2011

Ignite your Twin Flame

"Ignite your Twin Flame"

For most of my life, relationships involving the opposite sex have been a sensitive subject. I used to suffer from a speech impediment so the idea of approaching a girl sent shivers up my spine. Although I rarely stutter anymore, it deeply affected my self-esteem

In college I experimented with drugs and alcohol which gave me a false sense of confidence. Despite the toxins merely acted as a mask, I found this temporary feeling of self acceptance relieving. As I sought refuge in these substances I began to rely on harmful activities more and more.

It wasn’t until I got clean that I realized how much it had affected my state of being. I began reading books on positive thinking, meditating and really focusing on being aware of myself. I started a “soulmate” list and wrote all the qualities that I wanted from a woman. This included physical, sexual, emotional and most importantly spiritual traits. I also tried my very hardest to accept the present situation and move on from all past relationships. It was through this spiritual practice that I had an epiphany. Contrary to the cultural norm that is embedded into our psyche, the man does not have to pursue the woman. If you are embodying love and the qualities that you want to attract, the right person will appear.

In the winter of 2010 I decided to serve my community. I had never volunteered before and I wanted to develop selflessness. Through an online agency, I signed up for an organization that helps teach at risk youth photography. The moment I met the director of the organization I felt an instant connection with her. She would later introduce me to another female volunteer. The woman who would soon become my girlfriend has been with me for a year and a half and counting. She is the love of my life and I could not ask for more.

You do not have to read books on how to be a ladies man or how to meet the right guy. Just cultivate love and kindness and be specific on what you really want. Make daily affirmations, visualize and tell the universe that you are a person deserving of love. If you are persistent and patient you may kindle the fire for your twin flame.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Renounce Bad Habits, But Not Your Duty

A few years ago I began studying the Bhagavad Gita, Bible and several other spiritual works. Like the all pervading words of Krishna, the fierce compassion of Jesus and the sweet solace of the Buddha, I was determined to reach salvation even if it meant giving up what I loved most.

One common theme in all of these scriptures is the cutting of desire, craving and sensual pleasure. Exchanging your material possessions for an eternal and internal luminous palace is what the sages call "Renunciation." By using the words of the Enlightened ones as my compass, I attempted to live as a renunciate in a modern world. However, what I did not realize is that renouncing things that the mind is not quite ready yet to release can be fruitless and even counterproductive to one’s own spiritual practice.

I do not know if it is the lives of past incarnations that are bleeding into this birth or my affinity towards extremism, but when it comes to living by a specific spiritual discipline it tends to be overkill for me. To illustrate this, while staying in Portland, Oregon I gave away all of my clothes and exchanged these garments for plain white t shirts. One of the motives for this was that I realized that I had held onto particular clothes for way too long and I wanted to embody the color of purity. Nonetheless, I took it to the extreme and got rid of everything, even clothes that were relatively new.

It wasn’t before long that I moved out of my apartment and attempted to live in a car that was not meant to be slept in. One of the motives behind this venture was that I had difficulty paying my rent bill. However, instead of attempting to find roommates I again took it to the extreme and tried to live the less than glamorous life as a homeless ascetic. Needless to say I only lasted about three days and ended up staying over at my girlfriends place. Ouch I had become a bum!

In a few months I would later move to San Diego. It was here that I would sell my guitar to later finance a trip to SE Asia and India. In my mind I thought that I had undergone one of the ultimate sacrifice. I love playing guitar and music is my passion. Therefore there are very few moments where there isn't a guitar solo running through my mind. To be blunt, I crave playing the guitar. Thus, feebly trying to live by the words of the saints I tried to cut my craving and eliminate the desire to play. I did not have to sell it. I could have given it to a friend to hold onto until I returned. However, I chose the route of extremism once again.
During my travels I dreamt constantly of playing the guitar. It wasn't until 5 months into my trip that I bought an acoustic guitar in Varanasi India. The moment my fingers graced across the wooden fret board, my heart soared. Meanwhile my other passion writing, was not doing too much either and I had set it aside to intensely focus on myself.  After all why would I want to attach myself to something in India of all places?
Throughout my travels, especially in India I had created a set of conditioning that made me believe that I did not need to write, play guitar or do any worldly things that I loved because the ultimate goal was other worldly. This conditioning slowly made me feel apathetic and created a false sense of spiritual pride. Despite what I believed was a calm mind at times, I had shut out my intuition of making music and writing. This continued to the point where I chose to work at a job teaching English in Thailad. Most of the time I did not enjoy it because I only worked for the money. I did not listen to my heart desires nor trust my God-given talents. I was fearful of not being able to survive in this material based world and I suffered the consequences of dissatifaction. 

Now, after deep contemplation I realize that everyone's path is ultimately different. What works for one person may not work for the other even if that path is prescribed by the Buddha, Jesus, Krishna, Mohammed or any other Saint. For so long I have tried to decipher what being spiritual actually meant. It does not mean abandoning your worldly duty if it is in line with love.  

Give up worthless attachments such as toxins and bad company, but relish the ones that feed your spirit! For when you fully manifest the desires that are in line with your heart then you may reach salvation. How do you know if your work is pure? Observe how you feel when you do it. If you love it and are filled with love and light, keep doing it and do not let its flame burn out!

Once you know your duty and it is something that feeds your soul, offer your work unto God and do it selflessly. Do not work for a reward nor for material gains. The Gita states: "This man of harmony surrenders the rewards of his work and thus attains final peace: the man of disharmony, urged by desire, is attached to his reward and remains in bondage (p. 28; chapter 5: 12)

Discover your duty, offer it unto God, never turn your back on it and find peace within it.

Saturday, June 11, 2011


“Easter Island”

Facial monoliths dot the coast
They are motionless
Yet they know so much
Why are they here?
What do they represent?
Are they the monument of a past pagan god?
Or a giant's abandoned lawn furniture
Stone soldiers from the neck up
They hold their post from dusk till dawn

“If Guns Could Talk”

If guns could talk
Would they cock back?
Or would they simply say stop that
If guns could talk
Would they be hungry for ammo?
Or would they beg for the court systems to ban them
If guns could talk
Would they get trigger happy
Or trigger depressed
If guns could talk
Would they blame themselves for the arrest?

“What is a Recession?”

What is a recession?
It is the confession of society
A depression of reality
The truth is making an appearance for love actuality
Live by one practicality
Time to unite all nationalities
What is a recession?
The chance to dance in between realities

“Conspiracy Theorist”

Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
Involve the fear of reality with your lyrics
Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
If you think 911 was a set up
Then you’re the terrorist
Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
Why can’t you accept what the populace thinks?
Oh you’re the conspiracy theorist
I’ll believe it when God writes it in clear ink

“Word Revolution”

Let’s start a word revolution
We deserve restitution
From this urban pollution
Time for a resolution
Let our writing speak out
Right wing left wing
All just a political decal
Can’t you see now?
We can transform from being weak to wow
Seek on the prow
Take a seat in the now
Break free from the weeds
No time to throw in the towel


‘Flint rock etched onto a cave canvas
Yesterday's hunt gloriously depicted
The feather of the fowl left on an estuary
Becomes embalmed in ink and unifies with parchment
In a reservoir filled with blue
A single click exposes its mark
Inspiration is bled

Near Death Experience

I once had a near death experience
Not the kind that we have every night
Flashing lights mixed with astral flight
Where the ego dies and takes on different identities
Of past births, remnants, appendages of consciousness waving like sea anemones
Twisting turning, a gut wrenching scream that's as quiet as a mute
As loud as a nuke
A lone wolf stands on the edge of a cliff crying out to a sky with no moon
Break free from
Make a fist out of three thumbs
Walking in the midst of an oasis of tree stumps
Is this freedom or bondage
Self inflicted
Ego's constricted
So I pay homage
Claustrophobic but there's no walls
I'm homosapian phobic
Memories page like photo albums
I don't want to relive those moments
How does a gum wrapper lead to a child's birth?
A scrunchie lead to a plague?
How do the choices I make last month
Influence the ones I make today?
Injected with joy
Gone is the calamity
Have I passed on?
Or is this the first step towards insanity?
blissed out more than any smack addicts day job
It's too late to fix how I lived
But one thing's certain there's only one rule to live by
That's live in the now
But can I even say live?
I offered my body as a severance pay
To those who I have sinned
The elderly woman who I cut in line
The man who I didn't return a smile to
If I was still alive I would be so vile
But pain and suffering don't exist where I reside
So I feel like this whole death thing is all really worthwhile
As I fly by shrouded in the anointed one's breath
Cloaked in Buddha's thoughtlessness
I notice a newspaper stand a little bit to the left
As I read the text began to grow like a metropolis
Adjusting to my new flying apparatus
I realized I neither had to slow down or have any place to go to
The headline on the front page read
God charged for reckless endangerment
A three car pile up
The picture under the headline seemed so familiar
This is god, and he commits crimes?
In a moment I awoke to a voice
It's a good thing that you had buckled up