Monday, August 8, 2011

The Brawl

A few days while searching for a new book on the infamous Khao San road in Bangkok, Thailand, I happened to witness two inebriated men verbally taunt each other and proceed to duke it out MMA style. After the one drunkard turned fighter unleashed a wicked round house kick to the other contender's jaw, both men proceeded to take each other down and spraw on the mat, I mean macadam. Needless to say, it wasn't before long that one courageous onlooker managed to step in and act as a referee and break up the foul play.

Although the one seemed to walk away with just a few cuts, the other did not seem to fare so well. Walking away from the virtual ring and the curious crowd he was standing just a few feet beside me. I noticed his nose and lip were bleeding. Mumbling some slurred words in drunken gibberish to a Thai person, it was obvious that he was not in the right state of mind. Tempted to ask him for help, I wasn't even sure if he was aware of what just happened. Glancing up and down the pitiful fighter's body I was about to turn my eyes away until they caught hold of a freshly inked tattoo on his right rib cage. It read "Live life to the fullest" in an old English script. Although I obviously felt sorry for the man, I couldn't help but chuckle because he was living life to his fullest at least in his mind.

Despite the gnashed scrapes now etched on his blond hair and blue eyed face and the unknown cause of the confrontation, he was traveling in a foreign country and was not afraid to be spontaneous which says a lot considering many are afraid to leave their own house and go to the next county or city. Although I do not have much respect for fighters and those who express anger in negative ways, I do applaud those who take the time to experience another culture and immerse themselves in a different world.

Whether tattoos have become an over commercialized mainstream trend that have lost their age old rite of passage symbology, I have noticed that more and more people are getting inked to remind them of what they should do or remember whether it is for the good or for the bad. There was an obvious reason why he had chosen those specific words to be on his skin for the rest of his life. Now, If only he had another one that read "Mind Your P's and Q's."

Friday, August 5, 2011

Ignite your Twin Flame

"Ignite your Twin Flame"

For most of my life, relationships involving the opposite sex have been a sensitive subject. I used to suffer from a speech impediment so the idea of approaching a girl sent shivers up my spine. Although I rarely stutter anymore, it deeply affected my self-esteem

In college I experimented with drugs and alcohol which gave me a false sense of confidence. Despite the toxins merely acted as a mask, I found this temporary feeling of self acceptance relieving. As I sought refuge in these substances I began to rely on harmful activities more and more.

It wasn’t until I got clean that I realized how much it had affected my state of being. I began reading books on positive thinking, meditating and really focusing on being aware of myself. I started a “soulmate” list and wrote all the qualities that I wanted from a woman. This included physical, sexual, emotional and most importantly spiritual traits. I also tried my very hardest to accept the present situation and move on from all past relationships. It was through this spiritual practice that I had an epiphany. Contrary to the cultural norm that is embedded into our psyche, the man does not have to pursue the woman. If you are embodying love and the qualities that you want to attract, the right person will appear.

In the winter of 2010 I decided to serve my community. I had never volunteered before and I wanted to develop selflessness. Through an online agency, I signed up for an organization that helps teach at risk youth photography. The moment I met the director of the organization I felt an instant connection with her. She would later introduce me to another female volunteer. The woman who would soon become my girlfriend has been with me for a year and a half and counting. She is the love of my life and I could not ask for more.

You do not have to read books on how to be a ladies man or how to meet the right guy. Just cultivate love and kindness and be specific on what you really want. Make daily affirmations, visualize and tell the universe that you are a person deserving of love. If you are persistent and patient you may kindle the fire for your twin flame.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Renounce Bad Habits, But Not Your Duty




A few years ago I began studying the Bhagavad Gita, Bible and several other spiritual works. Like the all pervading words of Krishna, the fierce compassion of Jesus and the sweet solace of the Buddha, I was determined to reach salvation even if it meant giving up what I loved most.

One common theme in all of these scriptures is the cutting of desire, craving and sensual pleasure. Exchanging your material possessions for an eternal and internal luminous palace is what the sages call "Renunciation." By using the words of the Enlightened ones as my compass, I attempted to live as a renunciate in a modern world. However, what I did not realize is that renouncing things that the mind is not quite ready yet to release can be fruitless and even counterproductive to one’s own spiritual practice.

I do not know if it is the lives of past incarnations that are bleeding into this birth or my affinity towards extremism, but when it comes to living by a specific spiritual discipline it tends to be overkill for me. To illustrate this, while staying in Portland, Oregon I gave away all of my clothes and exchanged these garments for plain white t shirts. One of the motives for this was that I realized that I had held onto particular clothes for way too long and I wanted to embody the color of purity. Nonetheless, I took it to the extreme and got rid of everything, even clothes that were relatively new.

It wasn’t before long that I moved out of my apartment and attempted to live in a car that was not meant to be slept in. One of the motives behind this venture was that I had difficulty paying my rent bill. However, instead of attempting to find roommates I again took it to the extreme and tried to live the less than glamorous life as a homeless ascetic. Needless to say I only lasted about three days and ended up staying over at my girlfriends place. Ouch I had become a bum!

In a few months I would later move to San Diego. It was here that I would sell my guitar to later finance a trip to SE Asia and India. In my mind I thought that I had undergone one of the ultimate sacrifice. I love playing guitar and music is my passion. Therefore there are very few moments where there isn't a guitar solo running through my mind. To be blunt, I crave playing the guitar. Thus, feebly trying to live by the words of the saints I tried to cut my craving and eliminate the desire to play. I did not have to sell it. I could have given it to a friend to hold onto until I returned. However, I chose the route of extremism once again.
During my travels I dreamt constantly of playing the guitar. It wasn't until 5 months into my trip that I bought an acoustic guitar in Varanasi India. The moment my fingers graced across the wooden fret board, my heart soared. Meanwhile my other passion writing, was not doing too much either and I had set it aside to intensely focus on myself.  After all why would I want to attach myself to something in India of all places?
Throughout my travels, especially in India I had created a set of conditioning that made me believe that I did not need to write, play guitar or do any worldly things that I loved because the ultimate goal was other worldly. This conditioning slowly made me feel apathetic and created a false sense of spiritual pride. Despite what I believed was a calm mind at times, I had shut out my intuition of making music and writing. This continued to the point where I chose to work at a job teaching English in Thailad. Most of the time I did not enjoy it because I only worked for the money. I did not listen to my heart desires nor trust my God-given talents. I was fearful of not being able to survive in this material based world and I suffered the consequences of dissatifaction. 

Now, after deep contemplation I realize that everyone's path is ultimately different. What works for one person may not work for the other even if that path is prescribed by the Buddha, Jesus, Krishna, Mohammed or any other Saint. For so long I have tried to decipher what being spiritual actually meant. It does not mean abandoning your worldly duty if it is in line with love.  

Give up worthless attachments such as toxins and bad company, but relish the ones that feed your spirit! For when you fully manifest the desires that are in line with your heart then you may reach salvation. How do you know if your work is pure? Observe how you feel when you do it. If you love it and are filled with love and light, keep doing it and do not let its flame burn out!

Once you know your duty and it is something that feeds your soul, offer your work unto God and do it selflessly. Do not work for a reward nor for material gains. The Gita states: "This man of harmony surrenders the rewards of his work and thus attains final peace: the man of disharmony, urged by desire, is attached to his reward and remains in bondage (p. 28; chapter 5: 12)

Discover your duty, offer it unto God, never turn your back on it and find peace within it.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Poetry

“Easter Island”

Facial monoliths dot the coast
They are motionless
Yet they know so much
Why are they here?
What do they represent?
Are they the monument of a past pagan god?
Or a giant's abandoned lawn furniture
Stone soldiers from the neck up
They hold their post from dusk till dawn

“If Guns Could Talk”

If guns could talk
Would they cock back?
Or would they simply say stop that
If guns could talk
Would they be hungry for ammo?
Or would they beg for the court systems to ban them
If guns could talk
Would they get trigger happy
Or trigger depressed
If guns could talk
Would they blame themselves for the arrest?

“What is a Recession?”

What is a recession?
It is the confession of society
A depression of reality
The truth is making an appearance for love actuality
Live by one practicality
Time to unite all nationalities
What is a recession?
The chance to dance in between realities

“Conspiracy Theorist”

Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
Involve the fear of reality with your lyrics
Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
If you think 911 was a set up
Then you’re the terrorist
Oh you’re a conspiracy theorist
Why can’t you accept what the populace thinks?
Oh you’re the conspiracy theorist
I’ll believe it when God writes it in clear ink

“Word Revolution”

Let’s start a word revolution
We deserve restitution
From this urban pollution
Time for a resolution
Let our writing speak out
Right wing left wing
All just a political decal
Can’t you see now?
We can transform from being weak to wow
Seek on the prow
Take a seat in the now
Break free from the weeds
No time to throw in the towel

“Origins”

‘Flint rock etched onto a cave canvas
Yesterday's hunt gloriously depicted
The feather of the fowl left on an estuary
Becomes embalmed in ink and unifies with parchment
In a reservoir filled with blue
A single click exposes its mark
Inspiration is bled

Near Death Experience


I once had a near death experience
Not the kind that we have every night
Flashing lights mixed with astral flight
Where the ego dies and takes on different identities
Of past births, remnants, appendages of consciousness waving like sea anemones
Twisting turning, a gut wrenching scream that's as quiet as a mute
As loud as a nuke
A lone wolf stands on the edge of a cliff crying out to a sky with no moon
Break free from
Make a fist out of three thumbs
Walking in the midst of an oasis of tree stumps
Is this freedom or bondage
Self inflicted
Ego's constricted
So I pay homage
Claustrophobic but there's no walls
I'm homosapian phobic
Memories page like photo albums
I don't want to relive those moments
How does a gum wrapper lead to a child's birth?
A scrunchie lead to a plague?
How do the choices I make last month
Influence the ones I make today?
Injected with joy
Gone is the calamity
Have I passed on?
Or is this the first step towards insanity?
blissed out more than any smack addicts day job
It's too late to fix how I lived
But one thing's certain there's only one rule to live by
That's live in the now
But can I even say live?
I offered my body as a severance pay
To those who I have sinned
The elderly woman who I cut in line
The man who I didn't return a smile to
If I was still alive I would be so vile
But pain and suffering don't exist where I reside
So I feel like this whole death thing is all really worthwhile
As I fly by shrouded in the anointed one's breath
Cloaked in Buddha's thoughtlessness
I notice a newspaper stand a little bit to the left
As I read the text began to grow like a metropolis
Adjusting to my new flying apparatus
I realized I neither had to slow down or have any place to go to
The headline on the front page read
God charged for reckless endangerment
A three car pile up
The picture under the headline seemed so familiar
This is god, and he commits crimes?
In a moment I awoke to a voice
It's a good thing that you had buckled up

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

What is God?

God just is and is the isness of the infinite. It is closer than the cells of your body, yet to reach it one has to climb over treacherous mountains. It can be reached by embodying love, light and purity. However, God is also the opposite of all these which is hatred, darkness and impurity. These are all attributes of God. Love and hate are just two different levels of consciousness. God is everything and at the same time nothing. God is life, death and the void. This is the divine paradox. To describe the true essence of God in words is impossible because God transcends the mind. One can read descriptions of God but cannot truly understand what God is until one has an authentic experience of God. Moreover, a direct experience with God is the same as having a direct experience with the pure self or soul. God is deafening silence, the sound of OM and a clamoring calm. It transcends personality and sex although it can be represented as one through various deities. It can be worshipped in a church or on the way to work because God lives in the self and in everything. It is only our mental conditioning, desires and karmas that have veiled this ultra powerful and mind boggling force from us. For centuries, prophets and men of God have claimed that their God is the one and only true God. However, these claims are only half true. Yes there is one God, but all faiths share the same all powerful and omnipresent God. It is of utmost importance to realize that God can be reached through various paths, but it is always the same God because God is everything and everything is God.  

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Gurus and Safari Guides


Lillian Bertz: all Rights Reserved
Photograph taken by Lillian Bertz - All Rights Reserved

The crisp Indian air resonated with the sacred sound of OM. As I made my way around the ancient yet fresh corner of Kashi, stepping over a banquet of cow pies, past a toothless old woman drinking chai, I could feel the omnipresent and omnipotent energy of millenniums steadily increase and seep into my being. The closer I got, an indescribable and other worldly force began to multiply by the thousands and ensnare the mundane. The top of my head was tingling and I felt like I was walking on a cloud with a thunderbolt running along my spine. In the distance I could see and feel the sacred treasure that I and millions from around the world have been seeking, Mother Ganga or the Ganges River.
Sitting atop the crumbling cow urine soaked steps under a tree was a jolly looking Indian man dressed in all white with matted white flowing hair and beard. He was my first encounter with a Sadhu or "holy man." My eyes lit up as my pupils became enveloped in his black marble-like eyes. I asked myself, is this my guru? Has my search for truth ended at the base of his divine lotus feet? Drawn more to the energy of the river, I advanced towards it. I smiled and said Namaste (hello in Hindi) as I made my way down the ghats (steps.) The man kindly whispered: "This is holy water. It is very holy water to bathe in and drink." This first of many descents to the river bank is still etched into my mind today. Interbreeding with the interdimensional divine atmosphere were streams of mantras echoing over conical loud speakers. Without taking a breath, the priests rocked Mother Ganga to sleep with a serenade of continuous syllables in Sanskrit. Becoming enraptured by this circus of my psyche, I needed to sit down. Closing my eyes, I must have meditated by the river for at least an hour. Time seemed to have come to a standstill as I tried to make contact with my higher self. Waiting for the wading water buffalos to pass by, I came out of my trance. I then walked into the water at knee level and doused my flesh in the soul cleansing liquid. According to Hindu theology, many lifetimes of sin were cleansed at that very moment. I do not know whether it was a placebo effect or not, but I felt purified and lighter than ever upon leaving. Walking back up the steps, my mind was now much more aware of its surroundings. I glanced at the Sadhu once again. Without hesitation he smiled and offered me some hashish with a nutty vibe that was slightly kookier than before. I declined. It was clear as God's light that he was not my guru.

There is a saying that my meditation teachers in Portland Oregon would tell me: "If he looks like a guru, than he probably isn't a guru. This statement very much applied to my first Sadhu sighting. Now if he was in the running for a guru fashion contest, he would have certainly won. He had the long matted hair, white garb and prayer beads. However, he certainly wasn't the salvation ensuring spiritual master that I had hoped for. This is the sad but silly truth that many seekers must realize before coming to India. I was a bit idealistic and had built up the whole guru idea way too much in my mind. At the time I was reading Paramhansa Yogananda's "Autobiography of a Yogi" and expected to see levitating saints who could dematerialize at will. Now don't get me wrong, these beings do exist, however I did not come across them, at least not knowingly.

Ram Dass (Richard Alpert) the infamous writer of the spiritual cult classic "Be Here Now," states: "If you go looking for a guru, you are not spiritually ready for one." To expand upon this Bhagavan Das (Kermit Michael Riggs) who is a close friend of Ram Dass and one of the major catalysts of his spiritual quest states: "99% percent of the Sadhus are hash addicts who hang out on the ghats." Whether this is true or not, there are a very small number of authentic spiritual masters in the world. However, I was in India the land of enlightenment; I wanted self-realization now.  Despite this deep-seated yearning I would soon find out that this state of mind was counterproductive and only repelled the presence of holy beings. I spent a total of two months in Kashi and every time my eyes met with a man who donned dreadlocks and a saffron robe my ego would leap for joy and hope that he was the one. It wasn't until I went to Jaisalmer or "The Desert City" in Rajasthan that this way of thinking soon changed.
Compared to the swarm of touts that I had experienced throughout much of the country, I had found the area of Rajasthan to be quite relaxing and dreamy. Jaisalmer is most known for one of the largest forts in the world which is referred as the "Golden Fort." Another reason for its alluring appeal is that it still houses people and some of the finest Rajasthani goods are sold within the fortress walls. However its main attraction is camel safaris. In a few days it would be my birthday. I pondered what better way is there to celebrate turning 26 than by riding a camel in Indian desert? After turning down relentless overpriced offers from my hotel, my girlfriend and I discussed our plans over lunch at the Mr. Desert Restaurant. During a delicious course of dal (lentils) and chapatti (flat bread) my being became fixated on a dusty poster hanging on top of the entrance to the dining room.  It was an advertisement for Jaisalmer cigarettes, but it was not just any typical cigarette ad. It had an authentic Arabian nights and desert vibe to it. Gracing the surface was a handsome and powerful looking man wearing a red turban, with piercing eyes and an almost too perfect beard and moustache. Not thinking anything more about the ad or name of the restaurant, we made our way out of the cafe and noticed a small building with a sign that read "Sahara Travels." I had remembered this name from my guidebook. It had one of the highest ratings for camel safaris in the area and was strongly recommended by a number of travelers. Nearing the entrance of the building, I had the impression that this was not the average Indian tour agency. No yells such as: "You want Safari? or what you want?" burst from eager salesmen. To my surprise, the room was absolutely silent. Radiating from within, an authoritative presence sat with folded hands.  Seated in a chair behind a wooden desk was an Indian man of medium build dressed in white with one of the gentlest eyes that I have ever seen. He also had a beard and moustache that seemed much too perfect. Looking up, I noticed the same cigarette ad that I had seen in the restaurant just a few minutes earlier. My eyes traded glances with the poster and then him. Wonderment trickled down my body as came to the conclusion that it was the same man. Although he had aged, it was without a doubt the same likeness. There was an aura around him that was not too pushy and he did not try to force his services in our faces. When we asked about prices, the length of trip and the overall quality, he displayed a sense of utmost understanding and patience that made me feel at home. Pointing to a worn map on his desk he traced the route of the safari with an extended finger. My girlfriend and I decided to set the date for one night and two days. His name was Mr. Desert and I would soon find out the true story behind this enigmatic individual.

Several days had passed and the most unusual circumstances had confronted me. As I was doing my daily walk through the Jaisalmer fort, I was approached by an energetic and eccentric young foreigner male from Oregon who was looking for extras to be in a Bollywood movie. It was to be filmed in the desert and they needed wide eyed foreigner extras now. This was quite the surprise for me because a different director was staying at my guesthouse and I would often fantasize about him needing my expertise.  Without a second of questioning, I obliged to this once in a lifetime opportunity and said I would meet with the director later that night. Included in the deal was 1,000 Rupees ($20,) a hotel and most importantly a chance to grace the front of the silver screen. To my girlfriend's dismay, only male actors were needed. Despite this, she was still allowed to stay at the hotel and meet with the director, a man who was as a peculiar, comedic character of sorts. The movie was set in the 1800's and depicted a battle between the Indian and French allies and the British. Although I had no choice in the matter, I would be on the French side.

During this whole process there was a resolute voice in the back of my head. I had been studying Indian philosophy for much of my stay in the land of saints and couldn't help but wonder if Maya (illusion) was gnashing its ruthless teeth at me. I constantly tried to remain centered and resisted the urge to bolster my ego because I was now an actor. It became evident that the mind will create fascinating scenarios once it faces uncommon situations.

Days went by and after doing an exhausting all day dress rehearsal my shot at making it big in Bollywood was on the next day. However, there was a small hiccup. The movie shooting fell on the same day as the camel safari. Had I chosen illusion over truth? Knowing that there would be a definite time conflict, I went to Mr. Desert's building early in the morning to plead my case. I was obviously nervous because I did not want to disappoint the man and make a fool out of himself and his business. Despite these feelings of anxiety, I knew that he would understand. As I sheepishly conveyed my story he chuckled and said that it was not a problem. I only had to pay a small fee for the camel drivers who would've guided us during that day. I rescheduled the safari and as I walked out of the door Mr. Desert giggled, sternly looked me in the eye and said: "Make sure you come next time." Obliging to his request, I knew I could not disappoint him.

The movie was like what any actor or actress has experienced. It consisted of a lot of waiting, standing, eating and resting. On the other hand, the moments where I was in action felt like a strange trip from a past life. Holding a live musket with blank shots with my face and uniform covered in fake blood and ash, I charged and fired at the British with an overflowing amount of hatred that I had just conjured up before the shoot. I wanted to look the part so I imagined how despicable everything was, from their queen, their uniform, to the whites of their eyes. After doing this mental exercise and the same scene over and over again, my mind became extremely weary of pretending to hate a man who I had a pleasant meal with just a few hours before. I now had a new appreciation for acting and the high demanding skill and concentration that it requires. I wondered how professional actors live normal lives. Fighting the British was an experience none the less and after being on the battle fields from sun up to sun down, clad in a powdered wig and real sweat, I was ready to relax on the back of a camel.
Getting to the location was like a Fast and the Furious movie. The driver pushed the limits of the small rickshaw engine and at some points it felt like a roller coaster. I was laughing at the top of my lungs and holding on for dear life. With my knuckles white from clenching the railing, it was obvious that he was trying to break a land speed record. After twenty minutes of what seemed like a desert rally, we had reached our destination and were greeted by a small band of camels. Mounting the camel was like experiencing the first buck of a bronco. Riding one is another story. You must let your entire body from your head to your toes become loose as jelly. Any resistance whatsoever will leave your ass raw like a detox diet. Despite this rough assimilation to my new mode of transportation I developed a friendly bond with my creature caravan.
Lillian Bertz - All Rights Reserved
Photograph taken by Lillian Bertz - All Rights Reserved

The mighty dunes which resembled mountains of saw dust breached the horizon vigilantly. I could not help but wonder if Shiva was nestled in these very mounds. The air was still. Despite the heat it did not seem to affect me adversely. Roosting atop a dune, I noticed a Sadhu-like being. Resembling that of a white dove, transmissions of Samadhi radiated from his aura as I approached. Rooted in asana, his eyes opened. It was Mr. Desert.

I could see why this place attracts numerous tourists. My sense of time seemed to have evaporated and vanished into the sands of time. Making my way to the dunes, I felt like a kid in the world's largest sandbox. The land was untouched and my foreign footsteps seemed to have violated its virgin surface. Standing at the zenith of a dune, I mimicked Mr. Desert and sat in Padmasana. It wasn't before long that my stiff legs and knees began to ache. Glancing to my left the beauteous mound tapered off into a sea of sand. I stood up and marveled at this glory. I then proceeded with quick haste and positioned myself into a corpse pose. Crossing my arms over my chest, I barrel rolled to the bottom. With each bump and clockwise turn of my body, I felt a jolt in my neck and base of my spine. At the bottom it took me sometime to collect myself. Feeling like a load of laundry on spin cycle, all of my senses or lack of senses had been tossed out from me. Although today I turned 26, I felt like that of a 6 year old.
In the distance the bright red sun slowly engulfed the sky like Lord Yama taking a departed soul to the other side. Technicolored pinks, oranges and yellows blazed the background of a canvas that only divinity could devise. As the sun finally set, we all gathered around a campfire and ate some of the best thalis which were handmade and cooked by the camel guides. However, it wasn't the food that got the most attention, but it was Mr. Desert. With my girlfriend and I each by his side sitting in a circle of other foreigners, we both felt like his grand children as he opened up with a story. Breathing in and taking a deep pause as if this was the first time he had ever told it to anyone, he enlightened us on the origin of Mr. Desert.

Every year in Rajisthan, there is a competition called "Mr. Desert" or what is basically a beauty contest for Indian men who best embody the desert look of the ancient Raj kings and warriors. Our beloved tour guide happened to win not only once, but four times in a row! He had won so many times that the judging committee officially awarded him the title "Mr. Desert Emeritus." In other words, he was Mr. Desert for life no matter how many other "winners" were announced. As another token of respect, he is a judge for the competition today.

It seems that he had become a local celebrity overnight. Weaving emotion and charm into his story, I was wide eyed, bushy tailed and at the edge of my seat. While taking several pauses to smile and chuckle, Mr. Desert continued in stoical manner and stated that after he had won multiple times, his friends encouraged him to use the prize money to start his own Safari tour business. Being the soft spoken man that he is, he was unsure of this career change because he had already a successful truck driving business. His current job was comfortable, he was content with life, but was cautious about taking a new path. Despite these feelings of doubt, Mr. Desert persisted and decided to take the cards that life had dealt him into his own hands. It was then that Mr. Desert founded Sahara Travels and left the truck driving business behind. At this point he was in new territory and did not know what to expect. It was time for Mr. Desert to be Mr. Business. To his dismay he did not receive a single customer for months. Dumbfounded, his ego told him that maybe this was not the right business for him. To counteract the absence of customers, he sought advice from other businessmen and tried to be pushy like the other tour agencies. He went on trains, waited at bus stations and essentially became everything that he was not. As this cycle continued, more and more doubt began to flood his mind and set into his soul. Until at the brink of giving up, a rare chance opportunity came his way. Two foreign tourists entered his office and asked to take his photograph. Not seeing any harm in it, Mr. Desert obliged. It wasn't till later that the photographs of Mr. Desert would be used for a cigarette ad, the same one that I saw in the restaurant. Because of the exposure created from the ad, Mr. Desert's business blossomed and then flourished. There is plenty more to the story but this was indeed the highlight of the experience and it would be a crime to spoil it for other people.

Destiny had its way that night and I was in the front row watching the waltz of the moon light. My mind was abuzz with the words of Mr. Desert. It was a moving experience none the less and I wish I could have chatted with him all night. Lying in a thick cocoon of cotton I fixed my gaze at the miraculous nighttime phenomena. Without a single city nearby, the sky lit up with brilliant effulgence. I witnessed many shooting stars and became engrossed in the alluring beauty of it all that night.
The next day was spent riding camels throughout the nomadic villages that dotted the desert landscape. As I rode my camel I further realized how we as humans seemed to have lost a close bond and companionship with our fellow animal friends. Watching how the tour guides handled and treated the camels, I noticed a benevolent level of respect that is inherent in their culture. Contemplating this, I could not help but wonder how wonderful life would be going to work each day on a horse, than in a car. I asked myself: "What level of love can steel provide?"

During the remainder of the desert trek there were several stops along the way. This included resting at shady watering holes and eating. Just like before, all of the food was handmade by our drivers. I noticed that the two men were debating and heavily discussing a topic in Hindi. This caught my curiosity and I pondered what they were so engaged in. It's fascinating how even while working, the two men exchanged a high degree of compassion and companionship towards each other.

After trekking for most of the day we finally reached the end of the journey and the obedient yet steel vehicle that would take us home. The lessons that I learned from Mr. Desert were invaluable. The level of persistence and patience he embodies is worthy of an exorbitant amount of praise. Whether it is a career, family, relationship or spiritual path, his story can relate to all of these areas of life. Without spelling the moral out it was clear: "Never give up on your dreams and the greatest things will happen to you when you least expect it." It is clear that he doesn't just want foreigner's money. Mr. Desert's way of handling business is a model for not just all of India, but the entire world. By sitting in his office all day even in the brutally hot summer months when there is no business, he appears to be inactive. However, he is forever active in performing his duties. Like a Yogi surrendered to the supreme, he totally accepts his circumstances and is dedicated to his work. Sometimes there are days when no one walks through the door. Other times he is booked throughout the week. That is the nature of business and life. Being of Brahmin caste, it is evident that the quest for truth runs deep through his veins like the River Ganga. Just as a potter becomes one with the wheel, it appears that he has become one with his work. Mr. Desert may not be a guru in the sense that all of my darkness was dispelled, but the wisdom and light that he embodies is profound.

A few months ago my girlfriend's mother said that a man with an Indian accent had called to wish her daughter a happy birthday. Needless to say it was Mr. Desert. Before leaving, we had both given him our contact information. We knew that this wasn't the last time we would hear from him. However, in the back of my mind and heart I also had the feeling that it certainly would not be the last time that we would see him either.

Mr Desert Website

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A Student's Struggle For Tibet: Being in School is Blessing

A Student's Struggle For Tibet: Being in School is Blessing: "On October 30, 2010, after attending the 50th founding anniversary of T. C. V, I made my way back to McLeod Ganj along a tide of people..."

Saturday, January 22, 2011

The Nature of Self Enquiry

I am not a body
I am light
I am not light
I am a soul
I am not a soul
I am God
I am not God
I am everything
I am not everything
I am nothing
I am not nothing
I am something
I am not something
I am someone
I am not someone
I am one
I am not one
I am I
I am not I


Self-enquiry (also spelled self-inquiry) (Sanskrit ātma-vicāra) is a practice designed to rapidly bring about Self-realization, Self awareness, spiritual liberation or enlightenment, and is most commonly associated with its most famous modern advocate, Sri Ramana Maharshi  (Wikipedia.com)

This is a technique that I have not been using seriously until very recently, however I wish that I would have been more diligent before in my practice. When used in conjunction with meditation, the combination can be quite powerful and I highly recommend  it to those who are on the path of self discovery.

Self-enquiry is a form of contemplation where one questions the nature of their being and existence. The goal of this method is to realize that the body is inert and the mind--when it is agitated--is not the true self. The true self is thus void of all thoughts or referred as "no-mind." Although the scriptures state that this method is the catalyst for self realization, it can be quite difficult if one is not aware of the nature of their own mind.

One of the easiest methods to approach self-enquiry is to look at what you are doing this very moment and how you are acting. If you are eating, notice whether you are shoveling the food into your mouth, chewing and talking loudly or taking your time. If you are paying for something notice whether you are calculating dollars and cents or are content with the price.  Any states other than the latter mean that the mind is agitated and that the mind is attached to an idea or notion. To tackle these mind states one should enquire whether these "things" such as food and money are you. From there one can enquire further and question whether the senses, material possessions, relationships, relatives, the world, the body and finally the mind make you or are you.


You are unconditioned and changeless, formless and immovable,
unfathomable awareness, unperturbable: so hold to nothing but consciousness.
—Sage Ashtavakra, Ashtavakra Gita,[6] Ch.1, v.17
The great remedy for the long lasting disease of samsara is the enquiry, 'Who am I?, to whom does this samsara belong,' which entirely cures it.
—Sage Valmiki,  Yoga Vasista Sara,[7] Ch.1, v.5
O Rama, this enquiry into the Self of the nature or 'Who Am I?' is the fire which burns up the seeds of the evil tree which is the mind.
—Sage Valmiki,  Yoga Vasista Sara, Ch.1, v.5

Another meditation practice I recommend is to imagine everything you own such as your car all the way down to your shoes as dissolving into light and vanishing into nothingness. Such a technique can be referred as mindful renunciation. For the beginner it is advised to question the nature of one's possessions and things and then focus on the body and mind later. However, one should be aware that attempting to renounce the mind before having renounced things that one is deeply attached to is like trying to extinguish a fire with gasoline.

For people who have not yet tapped into the essence of the self, it is necessary to constantly practice self-enquiry, write in a journal, accompany oneself with holy beings, read the scriptures, apply Kriya (action) as well. This may include asanas, mudras and pranayama.


Friday, January 21, 2011

Free Tibet, Save Tibet, Become Educated on the Issues

Imagine having one of the most loving and compassionate people in the world as your leader and prime focal point. Someone who is both diplomatic and spiritual. Someone who laughs at how outdated war is and smiles at how powerful love is. Someone who neither is afraid to tell someone that they are wrong nor afraid to admit one's own errors. Someone who would rather rule with open arms rather than an iron fist. Now imagine that this leader is utterly powerless in his own country and photographed images of him are the equivalent of a prison sentence. This is a reality today and not the product of the imagination. 



According to Confucianism (A Chinese spiritual philosophy born from the sage and scholar Confucius) the ideal government must first stem from a wise and compassionate leader. However, what would Confucius say if the sage is perfectly fit but physically unable to rule his own kingdom? Like most Americans and westerners, I literally had no idea just how grave the situation was and is. I have seen the "Free Tibet" flags and heard about the violence and protests, but I was blinded from the eerie white knuckle truth that is a reality to millions of Tibetans everyday.  


There is a saying in Tibet: ""If there is no solution to the problem then don't waste time worrying about it. If there is a solution to the problem then don't waste time worrying about it." In regards to the current and ongoing situation in Tibet my heart is united with the former of the two, but my mind worries-not for my own safety (A sense of freedom that for much of my life I have taken deeply for granted) but for the sovereignty and rich cultural heritage of the millions of Tibetans who are both living in Tibet under Chinese rule and in exile. 


In 1950 H.H The XIV Dalai Lama became the spiritual leader of Tibet and in 1959 escaped to Dharamsala, India to evade brutal oppression of the Chinese. He has yet to step back into the arms of his motherland since his escape. During that time and continuing into the present, the Chinese have destroyed over 6,000 monasteries and slaughtered over 1,000,000 Tibetans in the name of what is ominously referred to as the "Cultural Revolution." In addition, mass sterilizations, barbarous tortures and a daily wave of over 1,000 Chinese immigrants contribute to a steady "Cultural Genocide" of Tibet. To make matters worse, The Panchan Lama who is the second most powerful leader behind H.H is currently held captive by the Chinese and has been missing since 1995. At the age of 5 he has been reported missing, thus making the Panchan Lama the youngest political prisoner in the world. He is an important figure because he functions as the next leader of Tibet after the death of H.H and assists in finding the future reincarnation of the Dalai Lama. The Panchan Lama is now missing crucial training time to help prepare for his duties. If he is not released before the death of H.H, the 17th Karmapa (Gyalwang Karmapa or the 17th Karmapa is a great enlightened teacher who is the embodiment of all the activities of the Buddhas.) could assume leadership and break thousands of years of unbroken lineage and tradition. (The Dalai Lama is referred to as the "Sun," the Panchan Lama as the "Moon" and the Karmapa as the "Stars.") 


The list goes on. Hundreds of missing and wrongly accused persons, the destruction of precious natural resources and the refusal to recognize  H.H are all sour ingredients that are brewing in a big pot of Chinese mystery meat. This is a mystery to the world. As countless unread letters to the United Nations collect cobwebs in the stacks, the Chinese continually feed the world with lies of positive economic development and growth. 


After watching documentaries, reading, talking with the Tibetan people and assimilating myself to the culture in Dharamsala, I have come to know and gain a far better understanding than before I had arrived. While staying in Dharamsala, India I was fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to volunteer at LHA and teach Tibetan refugees photography and computer. This was extremely rewarding because I was able to gain a much deeper understanding and appreciate what they have endured and gone through to get to where they are today. Although I was at first timid to bring up such sensitive subjects, I learned through talking far more than what any museum or book could offer. Judging by their character, I would never have guessed that a majority of the students risked their lives trekking over 18 days across the Himalayas with little food to live a better life in India. 


Rather than seeing a dark despairing sadness, I saw hope, compassion and a level of ambition which I have yet to come across during my travels. Learning multiple languages and trades is quite common amongst the younger generation and the unrelenting desire to learn about the world is a trait that I am constantly trying to embody and model. However, the daily reminder of not being allowed to live in one's own country freely is always evident. As one student boldly states: "Being Tibetan is like being an addict. You have your ups and downs."


I know the rest of the world is suffering. Everyone experiences suffering to a degree. This is the most fundamental truth of Buddhism. To further expand on this subject, the Buddha states that there is suffering, it has a cause, cessation is possible and it is possible by following a prescribed method. This is referred as "The Four Noble Truths." Without going into a verbose discourse on Buddhist philosophy, the driving theme of the method to end suffering is compassion and love. Whether or not you are a Buddhist, you would have to agree that these are positive qualities that are worth acquiring and embodying. If we were truly loving and compassionate we would not have conflict in Tibet nor around the world. 


All spiritual scriptures regard study as an important activity in acquiring more knowledge and awareness of the self. Therefore as human beings we must educate ourselves in the reality of Tibet. Modern maps do not even list Tibet as a country so we must first recognize that despite the events over the last 50 years, Tibet has existed as a sovereign nation for thousands of years. Secondly, we must spread this awareness around the world by using word of mouth and the media to create a much greater awareness. Thirdly and most importantly, we must put our words into action. Without action nothing will ever get accomplished. Self-effort is key and in order to change the world we must first change ourselves.




Comment, Share and Become AWARE!


References:


http://www.dalailama.com/ : H.H. the 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet
http://www.kagyuoffice.org/karmapa.html : HIS HOLINESS THE 17TH GYALWANG KARMAPA
http://www.freetibet.org/   Charity and facts
http://www.lhasocialwork.org/ Lha Social Work